-
I want to thank all the members that have upgraded your accounts. I truly appreciate your support of the site monetarily. Supporting the site keeps this site up and running as a lot of work daily goes on behind the scenes. Click to Support Signs101 ...
uh oh, another husband , wife golf joke
- Thread starter gabagoo
- Start date
Fred Weiss
Merchant Member
Mickey and Harry are playing a round of golf and as they reach the fourth tee a funeral procession drives by. Mickey removes his cap and places it across his heart and stands motionless.
Harry says, "Somebody you knew Mickey?"
Mickey wipes a tear from his eyes and replies, "Thirty-five years, she was the best wife a man could ask for."
Harry says, "Somebody you knew Mickey?"
Mickey wipes a tear from his eyes and replies, "Thirty-five years, she was the best wife a man could ask for."
Fred Weiss
Merchant Member
Mickey and Harry were scheduled to tee off at 7 AM on the day that Mickey's daughter was to be married. Mickey's wife begged him not to play but Mickey assured her it would be fine and that he's be home by 12 o'clock in his tux in plenty of time to give the bride away at one.
1 o'clock comes and goes with no Mickey so they hold up the wedding. At two they go ahead with the ceremony. At four the reception proceeds without Mickey. At six the bride (in tears) and groom depart for their honeymoon ... still no Mickey. At seven, Mickey finally walks in the door.
"Darlin", he says, "I know you're upset but let me tell you what happened. Harry and I teed off at seven as planned. When we got up onto the second tee, right in the middle of his backswing Harry had a heart attack and died."
"Oh my God", says the wife, "that's awful. I should have known it would take something terrible for you to miss your daughter's wedding."
"Terrible", says Mickey. "Darlin" it was horrible. All day long, it was hit the ball ... drag Harry. Hit the ball ... drag Harry."
1 o'clock comes and goes with no Mickey so they hold up the wedding. At two they go ahead with the ceremony. At four the reception proceeds without Mickey. At six the bride (in tears) and groom depart for their honeymoon ... still no Mickey. At seven, Mickey finally walks in the door.
"Darlin", he says, "I know you're upset but let me tell you what happened. Harry and I teed off at seven as planned. When we got up onto the second tee, right in the middle of his backswing Harry had a heart attack and died."
"Oh my God", says the wife, "that's awful. I should have known it would take something terrible for you to miss your daughter's wedding."
"Terrible", says Mickey. "Darlin" it was horrible. All day long, it was hit the ball ... drag Harry. Hit the ball ... drag Harry."
bob
It's better to have two hands than one glove.
Not husband and wife but golf nonetheless...
It was a slow day in heaven so god told his kid, Jesus, they were going to shoot a round of golf.
They both metaphysically appeared at the first tee of the country club, appropriately attired, and god, being god, had the honors, teed up and sliced his drive into the woods. As both of them stood there a little bunny rabbit came out of the woods with god's ball in his mouth. It hopped to the center of the fairway an eagle swooped down, grabbed the bunny rabbit, still holding onto the ball, and flew towards the green. When the eagle, holding the bunny rabbit, holding the ball, was over the green a bolt of lightening came out of the clear blue sky and struck the eagle, which dropped the rabbit, which dropped the ball. The ball landed on the green and rolled right to the edge of the cup. As the ball sat there poised at the edge of the cup a small earthquake shook the ground and the ball fell into the cup.
Jesus looked over at his dad and said "Are you going to play golf or f*ck around?"
It was a slow day in heaven so god told his kid, Jesus, they were going to shoot a round of golf.
They both metaphysically appeared at the first tee of the country club, appropriately attired, and god, being god, had the honors, teed up and sliced his drive into the woods. As both of them stood there a little bunny rabbit came out of the woods with god's ball in his mouth. It hopped to the center of the fairway an eagle swooped down, grabbed the bunny rabbit, still holding onto the ball, and flew towards the green. When the eagle, holding the bunny rabbit, holding the ball, was over the green a bolt of lightening came out of the clear blue sky and struck the eagle, which dropped the rabbit, which dropped the ball. The ball landed on the green and rolled right to the edge of the cup. As the ball sat there poised at the edge of the cup a small earthquake shook the ground and the ball fell into the cup.
Jesus looked over at his dad and said "Are you going to play golf or f*ck around?"